When I was a child, I sought to be loved by my father, I did everything I could to please him. Driven by my deep desire to earn his love, I worked very hard at it only to learn later that he expected so much more out of others than himself. By the time I entered my teens struggled with whether or not I would ever win his affection. His authority was as clear as the military man he was, requiring strict discipline to his rules and the inevitable consequences (often to harsh) routinely applied for not living up to his standard. I came to believe that love must be earned and that love is conditional.
Then God happened. I began a confusing journey after experiencing His unconditional love apart from performance. It took some time in getting to know God and to believe that He had the best intentions for my life through His Son, Jesus, the Christ. His love brought me into a freedom I had not known before and it eventually replaced the strongholds of false beliefs that I had about love. God’s love is unconditional and can never be earned, it is freely given.
“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39 NASB)
No one on this earth can offer us such unconditional love except God. No one. It is a gift freely given when we become His child.
God’s love frees us up to become all we’ve been called to become in this world and prepares us for an eternal life in His presence. Seek God with all your heart and you will find true love, which in turn will make your life better in loving others.
“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28 NASB)
A Valentine Wish for Marriage
For more trust in God than in each other
For more loving actions free of charge
For more adoring glances fueled by committment
And a thousand kisses yet not one less enjoyed!
His Banner Over Me is Love
Growing up I learned that love had to be earned based on how well I performed. The giving of love was by works and not by grace. This way of receiving love was instilled in my father by his father and he naturally brought it into his parenting relationship with his own kids.
“We love because He first loved us.” (1John 4:19)
Performance based love is rooted in fear and not in the freedom of grace love initiated by God. My earthly father inflicted a ton of rules that I had to adhere to. Eventually I figured out that I would never be able to consistently meet his standards. God accepts us as we are, with all our imperfections and shortcomings. He not only loves us first but wins our heart with His kindness towards us.
“But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, He saved us, not because of works done by us…but according to His own mercy…” (Titus 3:4,5)
God is love and He delights in pouring out His love on us. So much so that He sent His Son Jesus to remove the barrier of ‘works based love’ which could never satisfy our longing to be loved and accepted.
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life…In order that the world might be saved through Him.” (John 3:16, 17)
There is no fear in the perfect love of our Heavenly Father, there is peace of soul knowing that we are loved and accepted just as we are. His love brings freedom to soar into fulfilling our God-given purpose on this earth.
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear…” (1John 4:18)
Nothing can separate you from the love of God! (Romans 8:38, 39)
“He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.” (Song of Solomon 2:4)
Image: Nature’s Love, J. Shauk